so, when does this "life" thing go some where?[views:11193][posts:51]____________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:10pm - handinjury ""] ??????? well???? Im fucking clueless. when i graduated hi-school, i was all happy, i thought "if i just work my my ass off, ill have money, and ill take it from there". Bullshit..... 7yrs later im 26, still working my ass off, still not making $19 an hr, still getting shit on by people, and still not getting anywhere it seems. I play guitar in a death metal band -really glamourous- a hit with the ladies(you play what metal?). My body feels like its 32. Ive delevoped a sticky w/ the internet. I cant stop drinking coffee. Tying to quit hitting the pipe. Still shy around the ladies. I think im developing ADD or something.People say im strange but im the the one who is normal. Become really lazy w/ house keeping. Most of the time i stay in doors by myself. And the list goes on and on....................... There just doesnt seem like there is enough time in the day to get anything done. I want to be a kid again, and not give a shit about bills/money/jobs/the future. Or maybe im just fucking aggravated over my shitty 10hr work day.:pukeface: |
| ______________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:12pm - blue ""] dont stay indoors, go out. thats the best thing you can do, honestly. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:13pm - KeithMutiny ""] if i didnt know any better... i would have thought i wrote that... cept i dont play guitar, haha |
| ________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:15pm - Hooker ""] what a strange coincidence. I had my job review today and said shit like "the apathy in this place is a disease. it's turned me into a cold hearted asshole" and shit like that. then I was offered much more money if I go through certain training for 2006. a year away? if I'm still here in 2006 i'll saw my skull cap off and spoon chunks of my brain into my butt until i drop dead. |
| ______________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:16pm - nate ""] welcome to my world... I'm coming up on 31... it's hasn't been much better since I was 26... |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 8:56pm - handinjury ""] blue said:dont stay indoors, go out. thats the best thing you can do, honestly. Where am i going to go? Where should i go? I allways end up at Guitar Center, daddys junky or newberrys(all within 5min of my house), And that allways leads to spending money, and i need to stop doing that. |
| ________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 9:02pm - Hooker ""] Go down to the suicide store and pick up a few odds and ends. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 9:08pm - KeithMutiny ""] go on a nice 90mph ride through downtown lynn... and do me a favor. |
| ________________________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 9:21pm - whiskey_weed_and_women ""] life is what you make it man, if you don't liek the situation you're in change it. i move at the drop of a hat. get yourself together it's when the thing you own start owning you, you gotta stand up and say fuck it this is not the life i wanted. then again my last job was at a pr0n store and liked with junkies ! plus i watch fightclub far too often Ha ! |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 9:24pm - KeithMutiny ""] im a porn junkie.. wait... |
| ___________________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 10:09pm - DaveFromTheGrave ""] here's a conversation me and my buddy had recently polish sausage: I'd be better off now if I'd never met her meangene138: yea meangene138: i know meangene138: same with me and ashley meangene138: but i got some pussy out of it polish sausage: same here meangene138: and thats where it all started meangene138: cut your dick off meangene138: im gonna meangene138: lol polish sausage: nah meangene138: well im still gonna meangene138: one less thibng to worry about meangene138: and you know how i like the one lees thing to worry about stuff meangene138: thats why im gettin tims truck registered this week meangene138: one less thing to worry about meangene138: its like a big list meangene138: and when its all criossed off meangene138: i get to die meangene138: lmao meangene138: death is the ultimate lifetime achievement award meangene138: it takes you your whole life to achieve meangene138: and its all you get in the end |
| _________________________________________ [Jan 12,2005 10:36pm - Josh_hates_you ""] im always reminded of the scene in fight club where tyler is going off about how when we where little we dreamed of being rockstars or football players not lawyers and bussboys and you always see those other people living what seems like should be your life meanwhile you just go on day after day in your mediocrety of what you've become until you die. |
| ______________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:26am - FrancisPman ""] this makes me sad |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:28am - BornSoVile ""] i'm expecting the same thing to happen to me. I think i'll be dead by 30. I'm expecting a tragic accident or stroke to take me down. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:28am - BornSoVile ""] anyways, Cheers bro. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:32am - AUTOPSY_666 ""] Find what you love to do (like me) and pursue it 100% - you will lead a happy life. :newhorns: If you have confidence with the ladies, they will feel that and you will do fine. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:33am - BornSoVile ""] Old man Dwyer. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:36am - AUTOPSY_666 ""] Hey fucker! I will be 35 in March and people still guess my age at 26 or 27. Don't let stress get to you and you will age well too. |
| _______________________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 4:09am - coldnorthernvengeance ""] Go on a killing spree...it soothes the soul. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 7:01am - HANDINJURY ""] coldnorthernvengeance said:Go on a killing spree...it soothes the soul. Now we are talking:NEWHORNS: Thats a plan! |
| _______________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 8:19am - Mike Proteus ""] handinjury said:??????? well???? Im fucking clueless. when i graduated hi-school, i was all happy, i thought "if i just work my my ass off, ill have money, and ill take it from there". Bullshit..... 7yrs later im 26, still working my ass off, still not making $19 an hr, still getting shit on by people, and still not getting anywhere it seems. I play guitar in a death metal band -really glamourous- a hit with the ladies(you play what metal?). My body feels like its 32. Ive delevoped a sticky w/ the internet. I cant stop drinking coffee. Tying to quit hitting the pipe. Still shy around the ladies. I think im developing ADD or something.People say im strange but im the the one who is normal. Become really lazy w/ house keeping. Most of the time i stay in doors by myself. And the list goes on and on....................... There just doesnt seem like there is enough time in the day to get anything done. I want to be a kid again, and not give a shit about bills/money/jobs/the future. Or maybe im just fucking aggravated over my shitty 10hr work day.:pukeface: Look on the bright side... at least your band is top notch. |
| __________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 10:18am - Lincoln ""] Theres an old saying...."Life sucks...then you die" Life will never be happy. Life is always a constant struggle no matter who the hell tells you differently. You're gonna be faced with challenges everyday until you're fucking 90. The trick is to not let anyone or anything get to you and you'll be fine. I'm 27, just lost my shitty assed job that I was at for three years, lost my girlfriend who I absolutely loved and adored, things overall just seemed really shitty, like everyday something else bad would happen, but y'know what? I'm a musician...shit like that happens to us. Us musicians will never be fully happy in life......until a record contract gets thrown in our faces. Get out and play!!! |
| ______________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 10:44am - Josh_Martin ""] Lincoln said:. ...will never be fully happy in life......until a record contract gets thrown in our faces. Nope, life still sucks. |
| _________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 1:05pm - Lincoln ""] Josh_Martin said:Lincoln said:. ...will never be fully happy in life......until a record contract gets thrown in our faces. Nope, life still sucks. I'm sure it sucks a lot less with a recording contract though..... |
| ________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 3:11pm - retzam ""] DaveFromTheGrave said:here's a conversation me and my buddy had recently polish sausage: I'd be better off now if I'd never met her meangene138: yea meangene138: i know meangene138: same with me and ashley meangene138: but i got some pussy out of it polish sausage: same here meangene138: and thats where it all started meangene138: cut your dick off meangene138: im gonna meangene138: lol polish sausage: nah meangene138: well im still gonna meangene138: one less thibng to worry about meangene138: and you know how i like the one lees thing to worry about stuff meangene138: thats why im gettin tims truck registered this week meangene138: one less thing to worry about meangene138: its like a big list meangene138: and when its all criossed off meangene138: i get to die meangene138: lmao meangene138: death is the ultimate lifetime achievement award meangene138: it takes you your whole life to achieve meangene138: and its all you get in the end To be honest I find this extremely enlightening. |
| ________________________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 3:17pm - whiskey_weed_and_women ""] Well I'm cruisin' all alone, just a singing my poor song I've seen them hard hard times, but thats my kind of life I like it most the time, when I'm drunk and feeling high Sometimes it gets me down, makes me feel I'm unwound And I know, its hard When you're all alone And you dont wanna live And you've got that gun Hang On Hank 3 rocks ! |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 3:50pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""] Here's 2 song lyrics from the "Delete" CD by COERCION... The Pointless Routine APATHETIC AND NUMB I SLUMBER THROUGH LIFE WITH A STILLBORN AMBITION I BARELY CARE TO BREATH STAGNATED, I MERELY AGE STUCK IN LIFE'S PATTERN THE POINTLESS ROUTINE PASSING TIME, DECAYING IN AND OUT OF CONSCIOUSNESS THE DIFFERENCE FADES FROM DUSK TO DUSK ON, IT GOES POINTLESS FROM THE START AND UNTIL THE END ALIVE OR DEAD? COULD I EVEN TELL? HOLDING MY BREATH JUST TO MAKE SURE... Carve The Stone I'M CALLING OFF THE SEARCH ACCEPTING DEFEAT TOO MANY PIECES ARE MISSING THE JIG-SAW PUZZLE OF LIFE IS INCOMPLETE CARVE THE STONE YOU'RE LOSING ME I'M A RIDDLE NEVER TO BE SOLVED WHEN THE COLD SOIL WELCOMES ME TO REST MY BONES PEACE WILL BE MINE PREPARE THE COFFIN DIG THE GRAVE SOMEWHERE DESOLATE I'M FACING THE END WHERE I BEGUN... AND STAYED - THE FURTHEST FROM GRACE CARVE THE STONE YOU'RE LOSING ME DEATH HOLDS A SECRET THAT I'M SOON TO KNOW |
| _________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 6:24pm - pisscup ""] I work to pay rent so that I have a place to go when I'm not at work. I work to pay for my car so I have a way to get to work for without my car I couldn't make money to pay rent to have a place to go when I'm not at work. I work to buy music and fancy electronic musically gadgetry that I never even cared about until I realized I could afford it. I've lived for YEARS without ever having a "job" lately I've been trying the work thing. The more I work and the more I make the more I feel trapped into a society/lifestyle that I don't agree with. I feel weird. I own a car. |
| ___________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 6:43pm - dreadkill ""] handinjury said:??????? well???? Im fucking clueless. when i graduated hi-school, i was all happy, i thought "if i just work my my ass off, ill have money, and ill take it from there". Bullshit..... 7yrs later im 26, still working my ass off, still not making $19 an hr, still getting shit on by people, and still not getting anywhere it seems. I play guitar in a death metal band -really glamourous- a hit with the ladies(you play what metal?). My body feels like its 32. Ive delevoped a sticky w/ the internet. I cant stop drinking coffee. Tying to quit hitting the pipe. Still shy around the ladies. I think im developing ADD or something.People say im strange but im the the one who is normal. Become really lazy w/ house keeping. Most of the time i stay in doors by myself. And the list goes on and on....................... There just doesnt seem like there is enough time in the day to get anything done. I want to be a kid again, and not give a shit about bills/money/jobs/the future. Or maybe im just fucking aggravated over my shitty 10hr work day.:pukeface: hey man, i feel the same way. i just got a new job. the work isn't bad, but the commute sucks, and the pay sucks (especially for someone who double majored in college and worked my ass off in school). i look at all the ugly, downtrodden-looking people on the train everyday and think "we're off to the rat race again, chasing elusive dollars and happiness." i feel trapped. i feel like i don't have time to do what i want to do or be with the people i care about. i feel lonely all day, on a train full of people and in the office i share with people i have almost nothing in common with. My body feels old too. i have uncontrollable eczema that itches all day, and an uncontrollable acid reflux problem that really hinders my singing, and singing is my favorite thing to do with my time. it used to be my only solace when life got me down and now i have trouble with it. i can't really drink booze anymore (another one of my favorite things to do) because of the acid reflux. i also feel like i have developed ADD, as well as social anxiety disorder, to go along with undiagnosed depression. so, to sum it up, i relate to what you are going through. i am trying hard to help myself and seeking help for the things that are too overwhelming to deal with on my own. good luck with everything. hopefully, we'll be happier soon. keep working at it. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 7:38pm - handinjury ""] dreadkill said:>> hey man, i feel the same way. i just got a new job. the work isn't bad, but the commute sucks, and the pay sucks (especially for someone who double majored in college and worked my ass off in school). i look at all the ugly, downtrodden-looking people on the train everyday and think "we're off to the rat race again, chasing elusive dollars and happiness." i feel trapped. i feel like i don't have time to do what i want to do or be with the people i care about. i feel lonely all day, on a train full of people and in the office i share with people i have almost nothing in common with. My body feels old too. i have uncontrollable eczema that itches all day, and an uncontrollable acid reflux problem that really hinders my singing, and singing is my favorite thing to do with my time. it used to be my only solace when life got me down and now i have trouble with it. i can't really drink booze anymore (another one of my favorite things to do) because of the acid reflux. i also feel like i have developed ADD, as well as social anxiety disorder, to go along with undiagnosed depression. so, to sum it up, i relate to what you are going through. i am trying hard to help myself and seeking help for the things that are too overwhelming to deal with on my own. good luck with everything. hopefully, we'll be happier soon. keep working at it. >> Dude seriously...are you my twin(gemini)?? Fucking A , i thought i was reading own post! acid reflux problem: i have that shit, a few yrs back i had really bad problem with that and some disease i still dont now what it is yet(doctors are great, its either chrones or coliedis???- basiclly there is irratation at the end of my large intestine) I wouldnt have to eat anything and i was totally bloated in pain all day everyday. Try the purple pill- nexum, that shit helped a alittle after like 3 months, increase your fiber, stay away from OJ- soda- beer-pasta sauce-chocolate, do not induce burping. (It did hurt to sing/growl-no air w/pain). I had all kinds of tests (colonoscope, endoscope,etc) You got to look at your diet brother, i was eating like crap(fast food, microwave dinners, no vegtables, chocolate everything, all the junk) lifestyle (50hr+ work week, stressed out, un-controllable anxiety, no exersice, smoking to much weed, depression, lack of proper sleep, constant bickering w/ the GF, drinking) At one point i was taking 7 pills a day. I suffered with that shit for like 2 yrs.(those were some horrible yrs) "social anxiety disorder, to go along with undiagnosed depression". Fuck man, that shit is really hard to fight off, i cope so much better now. I recomend you see a gastroenterologist. Good luck w/ everything. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 10:53pm - dread_104 ""] just hole up in your room m-f, then spend the weekends drinking with your pals, making an ass out of yourself with the muff, and go to shows. and also bullshit yourself about how things will pick up in the summer. that's the beauty of this time of year: no pressure to go out cuz the weathers shitty |
| ________________________________________________ [Jan 13,2005 11:28pm - coldnorthernvengeance ""] Boo hooo... woe is me. Life is pain, get used to it or just kill yourself in the name of black metal. That would be killer! |
| __________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 12:06am - rachel ""] AUTOPSY_666 said:Find what you love to do (like me) and pursue it 100% - you will lead a happy life. :newhorns: If you have confidence with the ladies, they will feel that and you will do fine. dwyer speaks the truth. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 1:44am - AUTOPSY_666 ""] I am enlightened. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 9:23am - HANDINJURY ""] AUTOPSY_666 said:I am enlightened. Im not the least bit.:nuke: |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 9:24am - HANDINJURY ""] coldnorthernvengeance said:Boo hooo... woe is me. Life is pain, get used to it or just kill yourself in the name of black metal. That would be killer! I have tryed that in my teens, cant do it. Killing myself for black metal= a huge waste. |
| _______________________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 9:50am - coldnorthernvengeance ""] I'm not serious but if one was to kill thyself you might as well turn yourself into a martyr for some sort of cause... Blow some shit up first before you swallow a bullet. Give everyone a good show ya know? Be creative! |
| _______________________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 9:54am - coldnorthernvengeance ""] Take a vacation to Eastern Europe. 10 dollar hookers... Now that's a reason for living!!! |
| __________________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 10:25am - kellthevalkyrie ""] It sucks when you get the feeling that your life is just in a pointless rut. From time to time I feel that way. I wish I had good words of advice on this one...Myself I never stay in the rut for too long. I go on drives to somewhere I've never been before, read a good book, do something that gets me out of it. The sucky problem is that we have to WORK for a living. People in the arts/music have it rough, because we always (usually) have to have a day job to pay the bills. We just can't do what we love and get paid for it...it's very depressing at times. |
| ___________________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 11:18am - WhyamIandasshole ""] Can't take it, never could Time to end it, wish you would Friends and family, they're all gone Life for you is just a con Dig yourself a hole in the ground Push up daisies six feet down Take a dirt nap, buy the farm Inject a bubble in your arm Kill yourself, kill yourself Why don't you kill yourself Don't rely on no one else End it all just kill yourself Life is just a one way ticket Everyone must go around Here's a bucket go and kick it Slit your wrists without a sound When you fo don't make a big deal No dramatics, don't overplay Cause don't you know that we'll all fell Better once you've gone away You're a loser, there's nothing left for you A worthless loser, at everything you do |
| _________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 12:25pm - reuben ""] It's the crippiling depression that is New England in the winter, Life sucks.. |
| ______________________________________ [Jan 14,2005 11:38pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""] The typo's in this thread are mind-crippling! |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 3:57am - handinjury ""] AUTOPSY_666 said:The typo's in this thread are mind-crippling! Does it make you feel suicidal?:thescream::gun::nuke:=:skull: |
| ______________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 6:02am - swamplorddvm ""] HAHAHAH I knew life was going to suck way before I graduated highschool. |
| _______________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 9:02am - Joe/NotCommon ""] I am with Dwyer, sometimes life can get a bit discouraging, but overall I'd say I am happy with how my life is going. I am doing something I love with NotCommon and sometimes it gets challenging, but that keeps it fun in my opinion. However, if I was doing everything in my life minus notcommon, I would be a terribly miserable person. I don't really have any advice to offer though, most of you on this site are alot older then me but I wouldn't say I am full of youthfull optimism. |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 10:23am - handinjury ""] Joe/NotCommon said:I am with Dwyer, sometimes life can get a bit discouraging, but overall I'd say I am happy with how my life is going. I am doing something I love with NotCommon and sometimes it gets challenging, but that keeps it fun in my opinion. However, if I was doing everything in my life minus notcommon, I would be a terribly miserable person. I don't really have any advice to offer though, most of you on this site are alot older then me but I wouldn't say I am full of youthfull optimism. I think thats the problem, im limited to doing what i really want to do. Every other day i think, fuck this job, i would like to say "hey, fucking blow me and take this inspection and shove it up your ass, im cleaning out my desk and i am out". I allmost laughed in the one of owners face when told me before xmas that my position in the company is borderline management (during our 1hr+ conversation) Then i told him to bump me up $4 an hr, then we will talk. I feel like i have to babysit at work cause most people are lazy & incompetant . When i was on xmas vcay, life was great, i went to bed @ 2am slept till 10 am. Played guitar & drums everyday, did some recording, smoked pot all day, surfed the web, started drinking @2pm, my ex didnt bother me at all. I Did whateva i wanted- it was FUCKING GREAT! :doublehorns: I have 136hrs of vcay for 2005, i should take it all next month, then come back an put in my 2 wk notice. Then i can be a real poor musician, scrounging to pay rent, eating pb&j w/fluff, but im in a band !(that hardly practices):spineyes: |
| _____________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 3:33pm - AUTOPSY_666 ""] handinjury said: i went to bed @ 2am slept till 10 am. I do that every day. |
| ____________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 3:35pm - RichHorror ""] Clearly, you're not doing enough drugs and boozing. Together they make the pain and phone calls go away. |
| _________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 4:11pm - pisscup ""] RichHorror said:Clearly, you're not doing enough drugs and boozing. Together they make the pain and phone calls go away. Wisdom |
| ___________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 5:44pm - dreadkill ""] handinjury said:dreadkill said: hey man, i feel the same way. i just got a new job. the work isn't bad, but the commute sucks, and the pay sucks (especially for someone who double majored in college and worked my ass off in school). i look at all the ugly, downtrodden-looking people on the train everyday and think "we're off to the rat race again, chasing elusive dollars and happiness." i feel trapped. i feel like i don't have time to do what i want to do or be with the people i care about. i feel lonely all day, on a train full of people and in the office i share with people i have almost nothing in common with. My body feels old too. i have uncontrollable eczema that itches all day, and an uncontrollable acid reflux problem that really hinders my singing, and singing is my favorite thing to do with my time. it used to be my only solace when life got me down and now i have trouble with it. i can't really drink booze anymore (another one of my favorite things to do) because of the acid reflux. i also feel like i have developed ADD, as well as social anxiety disorder, to go along with undiagnosed depression. so, to sum it up, i relate to what you are going through. i am trying hard to help myself and seeking help for the things that are too overwhelming to deal with on my own. good luck with everything. hopefully, we'll be happier soon. keep working at it. Dude seriously...are you my twin(gemini)?? Fucking A , i thought i was reading own post! acid reflux problem: i have that shit, a few yrs back i had really bad problem with that and some disease i still dont now what it is yet(doctors are great, its either chrones or coliedis???- basiclly there is irratation at the end of my large intestine) I wouldnt have to eat anything and i was totally bloated in pain all day everyday. Try the purple pill- nexum, that shit helped a alittle after like 3 months, increase your fiber, stay away from OJ- soda- beer-pasta sauce-chocolate, do not induce burping. (It did hurt to sing/growl-no air w/pain). I had all kinds of tests (colonoscope, endoscope,etc) You got to look at your diet brother, i was eating like crap(fast food, microwave dinners, no vegtables, chocolate everything, all the junk) lifestyle (50hr+ work week, stressed out, un-controllable anxiety, no exersice, smoking to much weed, depression, lack of proper sleep, constant bickering w/ the GF, drinking) At one point i was taking 7 pills a day. I suffered with that shit for like 2 yrs.(those were some horrible yrs) "social anxiety disorder, to go along with undiagnosed depression". Fuck man, that shit is really hard to fight off, i cope so much better now. I recomend you see a gastroenterologist. Good luck w/ everything. i was supposed to be a twin, but i ate my twin in the womb, otherwise maybe i'd think we were twins. as soon as i get insurance i am going to get an endoscopy done. i think i will feel better once i get my physical ailments under control and get help for the things that bother my mind. everyone has been telling me nexium works, so i am going to ask the doctor for it. |
| ________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 7:02pm - XmikeX ""] i have a bachelors degree. and my life is still a shit mess. |
| ________________________________________________ [Jan 15,2005 7:24pm - whiskey_weed_and_women ""] go listen to Black Sabbath and feel better ! |