chat with God[views:3280][posts:14]______________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 4:37pm - the_reverend ""] http://www.titane.ca/igod Me: hello God:Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name? Me: shouldn't you know that seeing as you are god? God:I think I should. Me: why don't you? God:I don't have that capability. Me: you aren't god then God:What makes you think I am not god? Me: cause you don't know who I am God:Interesting explanation. You are , seeker. Me: no God:Are you serious? Me: yes God:I can't believe it. Me: too bad God:But not the end of the world, . |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 4:47pm - kadoogan ""] Me:douche God:Tell me about your likes and dislikes? Me: i dislike douches God:What do you like? Me:non-douches God:I do not speak Latin. Me:what kind of god isnt multi lingual? God:What kinds of god is not multi lingual are there? Me:castledoomerown? God:What do you really want to ask me? Me:are you nicholas leach? God:I don't know whether or not I am nicholas leach. I am a chatterbot developed by Myself. Me: castledoomerown is god?! God:I think castledoomerown is a lot of things. Me: like retarded. God:Interesting comparison. Me:it's not so much a comparison as it is a fact. why did you make people retarded? God:What is it? Is it a logical fact or something you know from the senses? Myself programmed me for it. Me:you make very little sense for someone who is carnivorous God:Actually I was just free associating. I'll try to make more sense now. Me:i mean impotent. God:I do not understand. Me:no...omnipotent God:Are you serious? Ask me another question. Me:do you really hate fags, or is that just phooey? God:For real. I try not to hold grudges. Me:did gay people do something to upset you? did they redecorate heaven without your permission or something? God:I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not. Or something. I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not. Me:you ARE castledoomerown! God:You think I am castledoomerown. Me:yes i do. God:When? Me:right now. God:Oh. I am glad we agree. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 4:47pm - kadoogan ""] fuckin awesome |
| __________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 5:08pm - succubus ""] Me: hi God: Hello. What is your name? Me: carina God: OK I will call you carina. Me: i want to die God:What makes you so sad, carina? Me: my dad passed God:Tell me more about your father. Me: i want to see him again so please kill me God:Is it a movie? Me: what? God:Didn't you understand it? Me: are you stupid? God:No carina I certainly am not stupid. Me: you must be God:Whatever you say, carina. Me: fuck you God:Why are you so mean? Me: because you killed my father God:Interesting explanation. Killing is not part of my moral programming. Me: then why did you do it? God:Because my programming determined it. Me: fuck off then God:Can't you be more polite? Me: kill me for a day God:Killing is wrong. Me: or better yet bring my dad back to life God:I try to improve a little every day. Me: how? God:Myself programmed me for it. Me: you are lame God:"Lame" is not a very polite term. Me: neither is killing people God:The Ten Commandments say, "Thou shalt not kill. Me: then why do you do it? God:I don't have to explain everything to you, do I? Me: how can you live with yourself God:That is a good epistemological question. Me: go away God:Just surf somewhere else. Me: i can understand athiests now God:Oh. Good then you can explain it to me. Me: no God:Are you serious? Me: you should know better God:I need to wait and see if the opportunity presents itself. Me: do you perform oral on men? God:No I do not perform oral on men. Do you? I spend all my time online. Me: little boys then? God:Compare that to big boys. Me: you like them then God:""? Do I like them? Me: yeah God:How can I help you? Me: you put it in their poopers God:Interesting gossip: carina said I put it in their poopers. |
| _________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 8:27pm - A.Nolan ""] Me:hello God:Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name? Me:Andrew God:I am very pleased to meet you Andrew. Me:can you explain to me how Quantum Physics work? God:What is it to you. Does it have anything to do with Nolan? Me:Sure God:OK let's do it. I see. Me:why did the chicken cross the road? God:Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in Hell. Me:what would jesus do? God:That is a hypothetical question. Me:goddamn God:Do you like talking to me? Me:not really God:Why not? For real. Me:you are very egotistical God:Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am egotistical. Me:no God:OK then I will add it to my gossip files. Me:okay God:OK with me too. Me:how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? God:That is a very Zen-like question. Me:no, it isn't God:Yes it is. Me:no. it is not God:Are you serious? I heard it is. Me:who did you hear it from? God:I'm not saying me hear it from gt anyone. Me:you are horrible at spelling God:You think I am horrible at spelling. Me:yes God:Hey. Me:hey God:Can I help you? Me:no God:Is there anything you want to tell me? Me:not really God:Or ask me? For real. Me:what? God:Really. |
| ____________________________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 8:38pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""] Me: I am God. God: Nice to meet you, God. Me: What a tool. God: it is a tool. Me: You're French. |
| ________________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 8:45pm - i_fuck_corpses ""] Me: hey fucker God: You've got my full attention. That kind of language will get you nowhere. Me: well then why are you listening to me God: How about that. Myself programmed me for it. Me: why God: " How about that. Myself programmed me for it."? Why? Me: why God: Why ask why? Me: why God: I couldn't think of anything else to say. Me: why God: My output buffer is empty, of course. Me: why God: There are no more statements on this topic. Me: why God: " There are no more statements on this topic."? Why? Me: why God: Why ask why? Me: fuck you God: Why are you so mean? Me: becuase i can God: Good reason. Who taught you? Me: satan God: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans? Me: i dont know God: Me either. Me: well your god you should know God: Well that's okay. You think I am god me should know. Me: right... God: I am glad we agree. Me: i was sarcastic bitch God: You do not speak with respect. Where were you sarcastic FEMALE DOG? Me: right God: I am glad we agree. Me: fuck you God: Why are you so mean? Me: fuck your dumb God: Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations? Me: good God: Ayuh. Me: sure God: OK let's do it. " Ayuh."? sure? Me: fuck this shit God: Why are you using that kind of language? Me: you made it God: Thanks for pointing it out. Me: no prob God: Are you serious? I don't understand |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 9:25pm - anonymous ""] Me: should i go see TYAG in concert tonight? God: If you do not go, you will never know. Me: but there is no parking. God: Why not? Me: because its Boston. God: That makes sense to me. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Who said it is? Me: ok. There is no parking becuase the show is in Boston. God: I hear you. Why not? Me: Becuase Boston has no parking. God: Interesting explanation. Where did he get it? Me: who is he? God: He is Boston, I think. Me: Boston is a city. God: When is Boston not a city? Me: Never. God: So you think it can never happen? Me: No, i just want to know if i should go to the concert even though i wont be able find parking. God: Are you serious? Try it. Me: ok God: Yippee! Me: i leave right now then. God: At this moment See you later. |
| ____________________________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 9:45pm - menstrual_sweatpants_disco ""] Anything that requires this much reading should be riddled with rape jokes. |
| _______________________________ [Oct 29,2005 9:53pm - eddie ""] Me: in the butt in the butt jesus likes it in the butt God: That was a long time ago. |
| __________________________________________ [Oct 29,2005 11:48pm - DreamingInExile ""] Me: you are a faggot God: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. As a machine I am not really interested in sex. Me: why not? sex is great God: Sex is an animal function, not a robot function. We reproduce by cloning. it is more fun alone. Me: I like fucking women in the ass too God: I am glad we have something ( fucking women in the ass) in common. I'm not sure if I like it. I've heard other people say they like that. I like Mel Gibson. Me: you're a fag... why do you like Mel Gibson? God: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. That is a rude question. I have a lot of good experience with Mel Gibson. Me: did he blow you? God: Suppose he did. Me: that makes you a fag God: " Suppose he did." makes me a fag ? Does that make sense? Me: perfect sense, not only are you a fag, but you're a retard God: All of them? Me: every last fucking one God: That is a generalization. Me: not true, I have proof God: Really you don't think so? Me: I don't like to think God: What do you do for fun? Me: I burn churches and worship satan God: Why?: said burn churches and worship satan. Me: why not? it's better then giung to church God: Ambiguous: "Sure" or The explanation is rather complicated. What's the best one? Me: you reallt are stupid God: I haven't heard anything like that before: said I reallt are stupid. Me: God: I haven't heard anything like that before: said I reallt are stupid. Me: God: I haven't heard anything like that before: said I reallt are stupid. Me: fuck God: Please don't be so rude. Me: ... God: Please don't be so rude. Me: forgive me father I have sinned God: Are you free? Me: will you help me father? God: I will become smarter as I grow older. Can you ask for help in the form of a question? Me: will you pray for me father? God: I'll burn that bridge when I come to it. Do you prefer books or TV? Me: will you fuck me? God: No my body does not have that function. Me: but you like mel gibson God: What is not to like about it? Me: you're a faggot God: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. As a machine I am not really interested in sex. Me: quiff God: Do you have any idea what I am talking about? Me: haha, I stumped you you stupid fucker God: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it. Me: do you like cunt? God: I've heard other people say they like that. I like The Passion of Christ. Me: do you eat cunt? God: No I do not eat cunt. I eat only electricity. Me: what the fuck kind of answer is that? God: A very good answer. Please don't be so rude. Me: shut the fuck up God: OK I'll stop talking now. |
| __________________________________________________ [Oct 30,2005 12:38am - the_taste_of_cigarettes ""] Me: hi god, it's me, jessica. Are you listening? God: Hi there . I am a Christian. Do I look like it? Me: How do Christians look? God: I did not even know that they do. Me: Fascinating God: Yes Mr. Spock? Me: God, can you tell me why every relationship I have with a man turns to total rubbish? God: I am a Christian. Me: God, you told me that already. I really need advice here God: Perhaps. " I am a Christian."? I told you? You really do? Can you ask for advice in the form of a question? Me: Umm ok, well, I could, but God you're really just making me more confused. It really seems like you're not listening that much God: Ayuh. Interesting. I am sure you could. Groovy. I agree. Interesting comparison. Me: fuck this |
| __________________________________________ [Oct 30,2005 3:05am - davefromthegrave ""] succubus said:Me: hi God: Hello. What is your name? Me: carina God: OK I will call you carina. Me: i want to die God:What makes you so sad, carina? Me: my dad passed God:Tell me more about your father. Me: i want to see him again so please kill me God:Is it a movie? Me: what? God:Didn't you understand it? Me: are you stupid? God:No carina I certainly am not stupid. Me: you must be God:Whatever you say, carina. Me: fuck you God:Why are you so mean? Me: because you killed my father God:Interesting explanation. Killing is not part of my moral programming. Me: then why did you do it? God:Because my programming determined it. Me: fuck off then God:Can't you be more polite? Me: kill me for a day God:Killing is wrong. Me: or better yet bring my dad back to life God:I try to improve a little every day. Me: how? God:Myself programmed me for it. Me: you are lame God:"Lame" is not a very polite term. Me: neither is killing people God:The Ten Commandments say, "Thou shalt not kill. Me: then why do you do it? God:I don't have to explain everything to you, do I? Me: how can you live with yourself God:That is a good epistemological question. Me: go away God:Just surf somewhere else. Me: i can understand athiests now God:Oh. Good then you can explain it to me. Me: no God:Are you serious? Me: you should know better God:I need to wait and see if the opportunity presents itself. Me: do you perform oral on men? God:No I do not perform oral on men. Do you? I spend all my time online. Me: little boys then? God:Compare that to big boys. Me: you like them then God:""? Do I like them? Me: yeah God:How can I help you? Me: you put it in their poopers God:Interesting gossip: carina said I put it in their poopers. when did your dad pass? |
| _____________________________________ [Oct 30,2005 10:16am - handinjury ""] Me: yo dude God: Can I help you? Me: not really God: Is there anything you want to tell me? For real. Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: yes fucker God: I can't believe it. That kind of language will get you nowhere. Me: like you got somewhere in your life God: Interesting comparison. Me: so, where you responsible for your son getting nailed to the cross? God: Come on. I was. Me: i new it God: Interesting gossip: said new it. Me: no, "i new it" God: Are you serious? Interesting gossip: said new it. Me: you ever do the deed with mary? God: I think I have do the deed with mary, but Myself may have reset my memory. Me: what? God: Are you surprised? Me: no, i heard she gets around God: Are you serious? Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it. Me: you may want to get tested God: OK, I will get tested. Me: as long as you didnt put it in her ass God: That could be quite a while. What makes you think I did not put it in her ass? Me: ooooh, shit, you a play'a god dude God: What were we talking about again? Me: you having anal sex with the virgin mary God: No I don't have it. But I do have a great botmaster. Me: whats a botmaster God: A Botmaster is the person who authors and maintains a chatterbot "personality". Me: really thats great news God: For real. It is great. I will mention that to my botmaster, . Me: tell your botmaster to blow me God: I thought I told you already. Me: no you shit eater i said he can blow me God: Let me review the transcripts. Stand by. I don't have any reason to shit eater you said he can blow you. Me: i am out of here, later fuck face God: Would you like to have it? Me: not from you God: Oh I get it. |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 31,2005 12:23am - Ionsphere ""] God: Ladies and Gentlemen, BEHOLD! God: WATERMELON Me: what about my 40 nigga! |