stupid warnings on stupid lables[views:5355][posts:12]_______________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:13pm - davyp ""] In honor of the intelligence challenged In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???...) On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." (...you think????..) On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time)? On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts .) On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness" (no shit, really?) On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what)? On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) :ralphie: |
| ________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:17pm - morkul ""] Classic's never get old. hehehehehehehehe....... |
| ________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:17pm - Abbath ""] davyp said: On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) :ralphie: so normanly my balls could stop a regular chainsaw!?!?!?! ha! |
| _______________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:20pm - davyp ""] Abbath, the answer is yes... yes it would..... |
| ________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:21pm - morkul ""] Elephantitis of the nuts anyone. |
| __________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:43pm - succubus ""] morkul said:Elephantitis of the nuts anyone. you just made me think of Breakfast Club one of my all time faves thanks =) |
| ________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 2:50pm - morkul ""] "Monet really pumps my nads". "Hey sporto, why don't you close that door and we get the prom queen impregnated" . |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 3:30pm - dreadkill ""] i have balls of steel that break any ordinary pussy american chainsaw. those swedish viking chainsaws ain't nothin to fuck with. i have the scars to prove it. |
| ____________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 9:57pm - MyDeadDoll ""] i wanna see someone stop a chainsaw with their genitals... especially a female |
| _________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 10:37pm - putain ""] davyp said On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time)? my moms done that before and she burned herself .. she a dumb lady |
| ___________________________________ [Mar 23,2004 10:56pm - succubus ""] morkul said:"Monet really pumps my nads". "Hey sporto, why don't you close that door and we get the prom queen impregnated" . it's one of my all time faves :doublehorns: to you for posting these! |
| _______________________________________ [Mar 24,2004 12:24am - the_reverend ""] MyDeadDoll said:i wanna see someone stop a chainsaw with their genitals... especially a female the girl in dawn of the dead couldn't |
| _________________________________ [Mar 24,2004 12:29am - Abbath ""] oh sweet! i'm never gonna get to see that movie! I HATE ME LIFE! |